The Eighth Tuesday

I have a theory that Morrie's mindset is more a productive of his age than his philosophy. I hope to dive more into this later.

I haven't read Tuesdays with Morrie in over 10 years. I had read and loved it in my late 20s. I probably read it three times. I can relate and understand why I loved this book so much. It's a different read now, but "The Eighth Tuesday" stands out as the best chapter up to this point in the book. The ideas in the eighth Tuesday resonate with me more than other chapters.

For a friend if he is too lazy to read the whole chapter, and for myself. All quotation marks are for Morrie. I'm removing any of the author Mitch Albom's commentary.

Morrie on the Eighth Tuesday

"We’ve got a form of brainwashing going on in our country. Do you know how they brainwash people? They repeat something over and over. And that’s what we do in this country. Owning things is good. More money is good. More property is good. More commercialism is good. More is good. More is good. We repeat it—and have it repeated to us—over and over until nobody bothers to even think otherwise. The average person is so fogged up by all this, he has no perspective on what’s really important anymore."

I'm not sure the US brainwashes people to consume. See reflection below.

“Wherever I went in my life, I met people wanting to gobble up something new. Gobble up a new car. Gobble up a new piece of property. Gobble up the latest toy. And then they wanted to tell you about it. ‘Guess what I got? Guess what I got?

You know how I always interpreted that? These were people so hungry for love that they were accepting substitutes. They were embracing material things and expecting a sort of hug back. But it never works. You can’t substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship."

That sounds better.

“Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not a substitute for tenderness. I can tell you, as I’m sitting here dying, when you most need it, neither money nor power will give you the feeling you’re looking for, no matter how much of them you have.

There’s a big confusion in this country over what we want versus what we need. You need food, you want a chocolate sundae. You have to be honest with yourself. You don’t need the latest sports car, you don’t need the biggest house. The truth is, you don’t get satisfaction from those things. You know what really gives you satisfaction? Offering others what you have to give.”

There are psychology studies that support this.

"I don’t mean money... I mean your time. Your concern... It’s not so hard...

There are plenty of places to do this. You don’t need to have a big talent. There are lonely people in hospitals and shelters who only want some companionship. You play cards with a lonely older man and you find new respect for yourself, because you are needed."

Effective altruism suggest some people's time could do a lot more good by making money. But Morrie is talking to an individual. I think Morrie would value effective altruism.

"...finding a meaningful life...: Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.

You notice there’s nothing in there about a salary.”

If you’re trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down at you anyhow. And if you’re trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. They will only envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone.”

Money buys happiness until a certain point. The stressors of poverty are real. Conveniences are convenient. But at some point, more money may fail to provide purpose or meaning, unless maybe you're one of those extreme effective altruist.

“I’m dying... Don’t I have enough pain and suffering of my own? Of course I do. But giving to other people is what makes me feel alive. Not my car or my house. Not what I look like in the mirror. When I give my time, when I can make someone smile after they were feeling sad, it’s as close to healthy as I ever feel.

Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won’t be dissatisfied, you won’t be envious, you won’t be longing for somebody else’s things. On the contrary, you’ll be overwhelmed with what comes back.”

Reflection

I think Morrie is mostly right. Companies advertise to sell their products. Those are forms of manipulation. It's funny Morrie uses "they" but doesn't define who they are. Does the US brainwash people to be mindless consumers? I'm not sure. It does look like the US tax system does incentivize more spending in some ways. Tax deductions and credits incentivizes spending. US uses sales taxes versus value added taxes (VAT). VAT apply a tax at multiple levels of production and increase the prices of goods. Higher tax rates encourage spending to reduce taxable income.

Ironically, I think many young people are being anti brainwashed against materialism, and I'm not sure that's helping them find purpose, meaning, or fulfillment in their lives. It'd be interesting to see what Morrie would say about US culture since his death. He would probably be very against social media and technologies decreasing human physical connections.

For an atheist, I like his use of the word devote. In many ways it may be better to devote oneself to something else, or others more specifically. 

Parenting is the perfect devotion. Once one has kids, devoting oneself to their kids should provide great meaning and purpose. So why aren't parents and couples happier? I'll save that for another rant.