A Response to the Meaning of Life

Siddhartha to Govinda:

“What should I possibly have to tell you, O venerable one? Perhaps that you’re searching far too much? That in all that searching, you don’t find the time for finding?”

Introduction

This is for my friend Brendan. Brendan is having something like existential dread about the meaning in looking for a meaning in life. I can relate. Here is an excerpt from a personal essay of Brendan's:

"I wonder, heading toward age 49, if the size of this question today, for me, is mental illness, bad thinking habits responding to feelings, or, maybe, unused energy festering. I ask the questions, then I "feel" bad. No answer! You've been at it a long time! It's how it is and going to be! Live with it! Just get some sun, a good meal, a rest, some exercise! Go have fun! Go do something for someone! You'll feel differently."

Brendan suspects his searching may be a groundhog day cycle until death or that "knowing" the meaning of life is more like a mask people wear. He wrote a follow up response here, he asks:

Is the starting point, "We cannot know"?

Or is the starting point, "We can experience the meaning of life ourselves, but cannot speak it adequately to others"?

Or is the starting point, "We can know the meaning of life through living life"?

Or, or, or ... round and round we go ... where we stop, well, death ... but before then?

This is all very simplistic, child-like thinking. Why? Why? But why?

I met Brendan because of my love for Siddhartha. Brendan read Siddhartha with me in 2023. I like his reference to "child-like." Childlikeness is an important theme in Siddhartha's quest. Siddhartha first despised the childlike people; then he admired them; and finally he became one of them. Siddhartha needed to become a childlike person. Maybe Brendan does too.

For Brendan

What should I possibly have to tell you, O venerable one? You're eight years older than me. You read, write, and think more than I do. I feel an arrogance in writing this. I doubt anything I can share will solve your dilemma. Your own advice is probably better than mine. And still, I find the exercise worth my time. May it be worth yours too.

I suspect your restlessness and sadness is more linked to your psychological and emotional state than any philosophical implications of the meaning of life.

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT)

You're probably knowledgeable of CBT. You may know it as ancient wisdom or as modern psychology. Either way, it's worth revisiting.

Since emotions and thoughts are products of biological, psychological, and cultural factors microseconds to millions of years prior, I believe Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is a very useful and practical therapy (I summarized it here). Behavior, emotions, and thinking are interconnected. Your advice is a CBT approach. "Just get some sun, a good meal, a rest, some exercise! Go have fun! Go do something for someone! You'll feel differently." If you're depressed, CBT may work. You don't need a therapist although it may help. You can run tests on yourself to see what helps you feel better. Pray with your community, like your teacher suggests. Are you getting enough social interactions? Are you meeting people in person? I have further suggestions if you're interested.

Ultimate Meaning

Is there one singular meaning of life that applies to each individual human?

I doubt it. How could there be? How many of the smartest humans in the history of civilization have looked? Have spent their entire lives reading and thinking about these questions? There answers haven't satisfied everyone. Laozi, Confucius, Siddhartha Gautama, Socrates, Jesus, Mohammad, and the list goes on. They have all reached billions of humans, yet they don't have an answers for all. If these enlightened geniuses couldn't figure out the universal answer for all, is it possible?

For billions of people these enlightened thinkers have solved the meaning of life. There is evidence to support any of the ideas. Motivated reasoning makes the evidence even stronger. Our biases, limits, and ideas on what's possible determine what we find and reject. The great spiritual and philosophical leaders found excellent answers for the cultures and environments they spread. These ideas have been naturally selected by humans. The religions/ideas that provided the most meaning and utility spread. I could keep going, but my point is that the religions, ideologies, and systems of thinking are here today because they are useful, not necessarily because they are true. I think many of them are true, especially in the non universally objective realm.

I personally like simpler answer one's grandmother might give.

Now I'm curious, do you believe life on Earth evolved by processes similar to what the theory of evolution suggests?

An evolutionary answer would be reproduction of genes. That's a good meaning of life answer. But it doesn't provide the answers for how to live. Or how to find meaning in ones life. Humans evolved in an environment very different than the civilizations people produced. This creates problems for the modern/civilized man. Modern culture and technologies are both awesome and terrible. There are books written about this topic. And I tend to agree that agriculture and civilization were overall a bad deal for human psychology. I ironically came across this clip from Dawkins today, The Meaning of Life.

Maybe a conversation would be better. I'm thinking of more questions than answers now.

Biological, Psychological, and Cultural

I like an answer Robert Sapolsky gives in his book Behave about why the chicken crossed the road. Here is a very short sample: 

 "It actually makes no sense to distinguish between aspects of a behavior that are “biological” and those that would be described as, say, “psychological” or “cultural.”"

You can't talk about behavior without an interconnected approach that considers biological, psychological, and cultural factors. If you can't talk about behavior without a multidisciplinary approach, you probably can't talk about meaning and purpose without discussing biology, psychology, and cultural.

There are countless factors that affect biological, psychological, and cultural. You can't control the past factors: the environment your ancestors grew up; the prenatal environment in your mother's womb; your childhood culture, etc. All of these aspects and countless others influence how you think and feel.

Most people find meaning in the traditions of their society, culture, and family. This makes sense. As science, philosophy, and collective learning expand, and technology connects more and more communities globally, there seems to be a paradox of choice. There is so much to learn and know. One can always seek to understand and know more. Maybe Brendan is suffering a paradox of choice. Maybe he would have been happier in a closed off society following the traditions of his ancestors. Or maybe Brendan would have been the non conformist in his tribe feeling similar anxiety. It's impossible to know.

Epistemology

How do you know anything? Observation, logic, reason, empiricism, faith, intuition, etc. How might the great ideas or possible meanings of life be tested?

There will be a problem in proving any of these ideas. A systematic approach could find consensus or convergence of ideas. Science could measure observable outcomes. Logic could rule out illogical arguments. But there is a verification problem. How can the meaning of life be verified? I'm curious what you think.

Conclusion

I think you're short changing yourself. You have many answers. But you're not satisfied with them. I can relate. 

I've found seeking to be less and less meaningful. I love to learn and reflect. But I've stopped intentionally seeking. That seems to have been a healthy choice for me. It wasn't an intentional choice. And that isn't helpful for Brendan. I've grown up and live in different biological, psychological, and cultural environments. Maybe that is a cop out. I feel like it isn't. It's up to me to find meaning for my life. And I'm a lot healthier being more active and more social. Part of me wants to be an intellectual. Part of me wants to be a philosopher. Part of me wants to live off the land as a hermit. Part of me wants to test my physical limits. Part of me wants to be an author. I can't do everything I want to do in life. I probably couldn't do 10% of what I want to do in life. I find what's meaningful to me and accept that I'm doing mostly my best considering all the obstacles and distractions of life. We all fail and fall short. That's part of life.

If searching for meaning has lost its meaning and or makes you feel bad, maybe it's time to seek for something else.