Seeking (June 2011)

I hate wasting so much time on facebook. I have a long meaningless discussion going with my close friends from the military. It is crazy how much people and things can change. But then how easy it is to revert back to an old self. I find myself laughing at all our stupid and crazy stories. How much should it being in the pass matter? If someone I didn't know told a similar story and they were laughing, I would think they were idiots.

Time is going so fast. I will be finishing my service before I know it. I  can and should be doing more with my free time, which I am full of. I'm sleeping and playing on my phone too much. I want to start writing more. I'm not really friends with any of the other professors. I should try to reach out to them more.  The neighbor kid annoys me so much that I'm constantly hiding out from him.   

There is something on my mind, but I'm not sure what it is. I'm looking for something in life. I told a friend recently that I'm a lot more content with my life here than I was back home. I have experienced a lot here and learned more about life and the world we live in. But I'm still looking for something. I want to be a part of something big and meaningful. But I also want to wonder around and try to see everything. "The more you know, the less you understand." This is so true for me. I thought I was so happy as a 22 year old getting drunk and eating delicious steaks all the time